oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
