if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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