Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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