we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
