Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
