so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Randomize
