I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Sext me about skeletons
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
