I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
