His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize
