Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
The air was thick with penises
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
