So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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