I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize