My Higher Power is John Stamos
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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