we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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