I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
