Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
