they need to just BURY HIM!
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
