I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize