he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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