What a fucking waste of an outfit
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
