my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
