No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
