This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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