no, he came in my armpit
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Randomize