Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
