Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
