What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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