break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
