just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
they're like a gay fantastic four
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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