it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
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Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
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I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left