Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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