We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
