are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
