You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
