I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize