why didn't you poke me back
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
