i don't like sucking hair
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous