How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
My vagina is very pro this idea
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Randomize