Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I look better un-naked...
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
