After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
My sheets look like a crime scene.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
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