I didn't shave. On purpose
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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