Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
My hand turned me down
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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