Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I just want to make out with him forever
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Randomize
