you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
