ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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