Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Randomize
