quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
