Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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