If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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