No stitches, just platelets and will power
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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